All's Quiet in War and Despair
by Flight-424
Summary: Finn and Rey respectively contemplate Despair and the times they felt it in The Last Jedi. Major Spoilers!


Rey and Finn - All's Quiet in Despair and War

Chapter One- Finn

Days. It's been days since Rey left. The resistance is crumbling, barely anything is left. Han has left the Princess heartbroken, unwilling to take risks. Poe is taking risks anyway, getting results but dooming dozens of rebels in the process, rebels we can't afford to loose. And Rey has been gone. For days. So when Rose and I approach Poe with the idea of sneaking onto a STAR DESTROYER, the one with KYLO REN no less, what can he say except yes? It's stupid, dangerous, risky, and it includes all the key components needed to form a terrible plan. But it's all we've got, and exactly the type of plan a scatter-brained person like Poe would agree to.

For a few minutes I let myself be excited. Maybe we have a chance. A last opportunity to pick up the pieces of the resistance, to fight, to make a stand. But Rey isn't here. She's been absent for days. How can I expect to beat a whole ship of people in 6 minutes with only Rose by my side? Last time it was Me and REY, and we failed. She had to pick up a light saber and defend me, while my idiotic unhelpful backside was unconscious. And I've only got Rose this time.

But hey, a plan's a plan and it's all we've got, at least all I've got now that Princess Leia is comatose. So… we fake it, I guess. I'll give it all I've got. Now, as we reach the planet we're supposedly going to find some obscure code-cracker in, I stop feeling the doubt, the pain, the despair. I let the pain wash away, taking in the beautiful sight of the city, letting the artificial light wash over me like waves over sand. Beautiful, I can't help but think. Appreciation for this city fills up the hole left by my negativity. Until I hear Rose's story. A story of child slaves, and animal abuse. Of building weapons, selling Wars to the highest bidder, just to put currency in their bank account.

The appreciation flows out. And anger files in. Rose and I get arrested. Naturally. Things were going to well for anything else to have happened, except perhaps death. I wish Rey was here. But she's been gone. Absent for days.

We failed to find the code-breaker, but we find some half-wit selfish idiot who believes helping us is in his best interests. Completely the same thing. Not. He gets us out of prison, and the plan is back on again. We (When did Rose and I become a "we"?) free the abused animals whose only fault was being born in the wrong place at the wrong time. They fought valiantly to get us out, and in the end it pain off. BB-8 and the idiotic code-breaker -DJ, is his name- get us to a ship before they could kill us for escaping prison.

In the end, everything turns out alright. Rose and I, after being betrayed by DJ, manage to escape the imploding Star Destroyer. But now the anger I felt at the mistreatment of children and animals has faded away. All I could think about was the fact that we didn't succeed. We didn't disable the tracker. Rey would have succeed. I thought bitterly. I still longed for my best friend, but looking over at Rose- maybe I'm not needing her as much as I use to. But my heart continues to ache from despair. Rey has been gone for days. And the resistance crawls on, at the expense of their spirit….. and hope.

After an intense battle from the dwindling rebels, we've made it back to base. I smile for the briefest second as I see Leia, alive and well. Physically, that is- I'm not sure she'll ever recover emotionally. It appears we rebels will continue to deal with crisis after crisis, death after death, loss after loss. Kylo Ren has come with his army-the emperor is dead, it seems - and now we must deal with him. I'm not sure which is worse. He comes bearing canons that could easily crack what was formerly thought to be an impenetrable fortress. Once again, I go out on a suicide mission. Many of us go out in speeders, attempting to get close enough to take out the canon. Not long after, there are three of us left. And taking out the canon means death.

I don't hesitate. I go straight for it, my path clear. I can be rid of the despair, now. Ignoring the voices in my ear, screaming, begging me to turn back, I wipe the sweat from my face. Panic briefly sets in, I can't breath I can't breath I can't breath. So hot so so hot and I can't breath- I conjure up a picture of Rey. For her. To my utter surprise, however, that image quickly gets replaced by one of Rose. Alright then, for her. The thought instantaneously rings true in my head, and my beating heart calms. By now I'm getting steadily closer, hundreds of feet per second. Almost there, almost there, almost-

Something SLAMS into my speeder, throwing me off course and I cry out. There's ringing in my ears, a constant buzz that refuses to go away. I get up breathlessly and search desperately, taking in the scene. ROSE! I see her crashed, rusted speeder in smoking pieces. And everything stops. The noise. Explosions. Even the ringing. Just nothingness and pain. Gosh, so much pain. I come to my senses long enough for her to kiss me.

After a distraction, courageously orchestrated by Master Skywalker, we manage to get out, thanks to Rey. She's here. Rey is back. The words barely register in my brain, but then all at once I'm rushing forward and hugging her desperately. For a split second everything is okay. Rey is here. I'm not hurt. The remainder of the resistance is temporarily safe. But then I think of Rose, and all I feel is despair.


End file.
